Care

Just knowing that he still cares about me hurts. Knowing that he might still want to contact me but I've stopped him sound mean! Knowing that I also want to contact him but I'm stopping myself sounds ridiculous!

Why am I doing all these things? Is this really helping. I dont know. It hasn't helped me at all. Been sad all through it? Why? What can I do to help me be happy? I dont know?

A few more guys approached me on the weekend but again I shoed them off. I just didn't feel anything there, didn't feel any connection, didn't feel it was right, just didn't feel anything at all.

I feel like I am living each day as if I'm in cyber space. I really dont know what I am doing, feeling, saying. Just living because I have to live, eating because I have to eat and thats it..... : (