I am still refreshing my emails (but less frequently) and I found there are now more events I cant attend as he will be there too! : (
Why is it that I am the one that has to sacrifice not going to the events? Why cant he sacrifice for me and let me attend for once? But do I really want to attend? I am actually forcing myself to go? Forcing myself to find someone to go with? Forcing myself to interact with this person and not knowing if I really want to see this person? At least with him, he wants to attend and has someone he wants to bring along that he wants to spend time with. Maybe its a better option if he goes? At least he will get more enjoyment out of it! : (
Today I have been crying. Crying that why did he get the easy way out of this breakup. He gets to enjoy having a new gf, enjoy life, be happy and enjoy attending all the events I use to take him to. I get to be unhappy, sad, lonely and cant attend my own events?
So what can my task be today? Maybe to stop complaining about life and just live it. Complaining will only make me more unhappy : )
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