I just want to stop crying!!! :(
It has been a terrible journey. Not like I have not been on this type of journey before. But each time it's the same. It doesn't get easier! People say time will heal all wounds? I say time has done nothing for me. I still feel the same level of hurt! The only way I will stop crying is if I can find someone that will make me happy. Until then I guess this crying journey will just continue!! :(
I'm glad I started this blog. I promised myself I will never tell him how hurt I am anymore. He is happy now and I want him to stay happy and not hear any of my unhappy stories. So if I ever have to urge to want to share my unhappiness with him I will share it here instead. Sometimes I feel will he feel my unhappiness when he emails me? I really dont want him to feel bad at all. I want him to just enjoy his new found happy life and not have to worry about me. I'm concerned I'm in his way. If he doesn't hear from me then I wont be able to pass on any of my unhappiness to him.
So should I just stop contacting him. Should I just let him enjoy his happy journey? He doesn't need me anymore. He will sooner or later totally forget about me and not contact me. I can see that happening soon. So I might as well just keep all my unhappy thoughts within myself and just let him go. Let him stay in his happy state? I don't know.
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