still sad

Dont know what I am feeling today. Guess I miss him? And I realised everytime he contacts me I will miss him for a bit after that. So guess my 2nd request for him to not contact me is a wise decision. 

I dont know how I will feel the next month and a half without hearing from him. I will truely miss it and keep wanting to know what he is doing in his life. If he is happy or sad. But I guess this is the trade off.

I still feel sad. I just want him to give me a big big hug. Want to be able to cry in his arms. Maybe just want to see him in person. Cant believe its been two months since I last saw him. He does seem very distant now. I can vaguely remember how he looks like without looking back at old pictures to remind myself.

How long will this drag on for? I hope not long.